Lazy.

That's what I am.

If not all the time, especially today. I really didn't want to do anything. Not go to the gym, not even write a new blog post. Blah.

I feel unhappy today. Well more dissatisfied. Not sure why.

I sang for hours on end earlier, when I was home alone. Usually I only do that when I'm happy. Today, I feel like I did it out of pure boredom. I really want to learn how to play guitar; music means a lot to me and I'd love to be able to write my own songs.

So much yearning, so little reward.

Maybe I have to go out and get it. But that would take effort and motivation, two things I am seriously lacking. I wish I had them. More yearning. Gah.

I'm tired all the time. I can't focus. I do simple tasks without thinking, and minutes later I find myself in the middle of doing something I had no idea I'd started. Stupid brain, can't you pull out of your little fantasy world for one day and focus on real life?

Confidence level for the week = approximately 1.4

Sucks. I feel like everything is influencing me, like the world is on my shoulders. I hate hiding things from people. I hate pressure. I hate all these stupid emotions I have no right to feel. Someone just take me away from here?

I guess you could say I was unhappy today. I was. I don't even know why.

That and distracted. What else is new? I need to learn to control my own thought process. This is starting to control me. But don't worry, like everything else in my God forsaken life, I'm working on it.

"Don't lose hope. When it gets darkest, the stars come out."

-Unknown.