It's times like these when I start to lose my grip on everything.
I try to be strong, but sometimes I get myself into situations that I can't get out of.
I always try my best to do the right thing; what's best for me and what's best for everyone else. But sometimes, there just isn't a stable compromise.
Things need to change. I need to make a decision.
Is it really wrong for me to want a shoulder to cry on?
Everything feels like it's crumbling. Falling apart around me. I'm trying to pick up the pieces but I'm never fast enough. Never good enough.
My face is painted with a constant air of happiness. How can no one see that I'm not truly happy? That I'm dreading whatever is to come? I hate my life right now. I hate that it's come to this, and I'm mostly to blame.
Whenever I try to do something right, it always turns out wrong. Is my sense of reality totally skewed? I don't think I can take faking it anymore. But what good does wallowing in my own misery do? Nothing.
I need to do what I always do. Suck it up, wait it out, deal with it and move on.
"With every breath that I am worth here on earth..
I'm sending all my love to you.
So if you dare to second guess;
you can rest assured
that all my love's for you."
-Green Day.
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